What Do Later Daters Talk About?

Posted by Andrew • September 19, 2017

When dating, there are generally some common questions or topics that come up, whether you’re in your 30s or 50s – with variation. As a later dater, it can be hard not to focus on the negatives you’ve experienced along your romantic journey. Baggage, pain, regrets; it all floats to the surface, whether you bring it up or not.

As long as you’ve been dating, you might even grow tired of discussing the same things over and over, although it might be necessary. It’s also possible to feel the urge to go into detail on some less comfortable, deep topics, which you are more fixed on at this time in your life. It may be too early for those right now; keep it light at first, and let that happen organically.

I know the struggles that go with first dates as a later dater, so I wanted to share with you a few things I’ve learned in the process. Below are some topics that are great for exploring your date, while keeping a fair distance on a few matters, and stirring up the conversation to keep it interesting.

  1. Family. When it comes to discussing family, try not to overdo it; keep it light and positive, asking about their family in light terms as well.
  2. Career. Ask about what they do, what they’ve done, and why. To spice it up: ask what their worst and favorite jobs have been. When you talk about your own career, be humble; don’t try to brag, and try not to focus too much on money.
  3. Accomplishments. What have they checked off their bucket list, and what do they still want to accomplish?
  4. Shared interests. Dig deeper to find out what they love to do, and look for ways in which you can relate and share in those together.
  5. Choose Three Things You Like. Think of three positive qualities that you like about them, and remember them throughout the evening. If the date isn’t going great, at least these will help you stay positive.

Remember that your deepest life struggles full of exes and bad decisions don’t need to come out on the first date. Think light. Think fun. Think “new start.”


XoXo, Donna

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